Promise….

I promise I am not going to love you. Not even when you look at me with those soft brown eyes and that tender smile. Not even when you make sure I have coffee before I head off to work.

I won’t love you when you touch me the way that you do. Or when you bring me close and just linger there. Or when you whisper to me sweet things. I won’t.

I won’t love you when you encourage me to be healthy and eat. Or when you help me figure something out that I have struggled with. It’s not going to happen.

I won’t love you when you rush to see me so happily and kiss me on the cheek and then run away. Even though it’s cute and makes me laugh, I won’t fall for it.

I won’t love you when you teach me to think outside of myself. When you bring me to a point that I can view things differently and I learn something from it. Forget about it.

I won’t love you when you make me want to scream at you. Even if I realize that you are right. I can’t do it.

I won’t love you when you are sleeping and you just touch me for a minute, patting me softly to let me know you are there before you roll over. This can’t be real.

I won’t love you when I wake up next to you and watch you sleep peacefully. Or when I listen to you breathing softly and deeply and so relaxed.

I promise I won’t. It’s not going to happen. I won’t fall for it. Forget about it. This can’t be real.

Shit. Maybe it already happened.
Another broken promise.
Figures.

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